http://www.drwebman.com/leroymercer

John Bean
1951-1984
(the REAL, the one, the only true Leroy Mercer)

I put the website, www.drwebman.com/leroymercer, together to "set the record" straight.
I want to praise John Bean as the genius behind "Leroy Mercer"
and complain about "Roy D. Mercer" and the "Jerky Boys". (and now "Lee Roy Mercer"?)
I believe John Bean preceded them by many years, his calls were real and the similarities are unmistakable.
I've heard that "Roy D. Mercer" is/are/may be Oklahoma's shock jocks
who appear to have almost plagiarized one of John Bean's aliases, Lee Roy Mercer.
And, the Jerky Boys were just damn-yankee (we don't capitalize yankee down South!), carpetbagger, wannabe's.

The late John Bean

Here's the skinny, my opinion:

1. John Bean (Johnny to those who knew him) was a real person! When he was only 19 year old, around 1970, he was diagnosed with cancer and was given radiation treatments. He got better and everyone thought he was cured. But, about 10 years later he got sick again and his family believe he was over-radiated during his treatments, damaging his heart and lungs. He was given only weeks to live, but he lived three (3) more years. During this time he was usually stuck at home, bored. He made music, but he also made prank phone calls to people. (Lucky for us all he taped them.) His calls were real and the people he called were real. (In some of his calls, John called himself Sid Arnwine, Raleigh Arnwine, Roy Morgan, Leroy Mercer / Lee Roy Mercer and others. But, Leroy Morgan was the name that seemed to stick in the mind of those who heard his tapes before they knew who he was.)

Not only were these calls hilariously funny, it was amazing that he was so quick with comebacks (and he never cracked up to give his pranks away). Fortunately, someone heard these tapes John left and made a copy. This guy copied them for someone, they made copies, they made copies, etc....... until they were all over the country. The sound quality was terrible because they had been copied so many times, but they were funny as hell! (My dad, a deacon who never curses, couldn't help but laugh at the tape.) It was like a secret society. You'd say "HUH-UH?" to a friend and they'd laugh.
(Sorta like "CAN YOU HEAR ME ALRIGHT? TEST, TEST" by "Lester Roadhog Moran", but that's another story.)

2. I was told that some disc jockey heard these tapes then went into the studio, made FAKE prank calls, put them on the air and (when his audience liked them) started making more FAKES and selling them as "Roy D. Mercer".

3. Now, Roy D. Mercer is everywhere. (Even in Wal-Mart.) These copycats are making money while the real genius behind it all has been cold in the ground since 1988 and not receiving the credit (or money) he is due, in my opinion!

4. I've had a few lawyers contact me in the past wanting to sue the "Roy D's" and I forward them to John's sister, Betty. (I hope she can sue, win and collect a MILLION DOLLARS from all these grave-robbers.)

5. Latest UPDATE: I just learned there may be a new imposter who's calling himself Lee Roy Mercer and is even offering to make personal appearances! I've been told that they are selling products online. I wonder if this is authorized by Johnny's heirs!?!?!? The thing that pisses me off more that anything is "at skinny-lil-sombitch" is even selling autographs of "Lee Roy Mercer". If John's family ain't gettin' nothin' out of it.....that just ain't right. If these copy-cats are doing the right thing, I salute them. If not, I hope that when they're burning in hell, Satan "takes a 2x4 to their ass"!


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Some of John Bean's recordings:

Eddie's Auto ("It's an Oilllllll Filter")
C&C Auto (Rim)
Thom McCann's ("They's supposed to be damn gooduns.")
357 Shells (The only time someone turned it around on John.)
Lt. Gentry (He served under Gen. Lee!?!?!?)
Mrs. Galyon
Plots
Pigs
Ikey (He and a friend were drunk and trying to find a friend's place in Atlanta)
Tennessee (Touching song written by Johnny. You can hear how weak he is getting when he sings.)
I Hate Atlanta (Song written as a result of the "IKEY" trip, I guess.)

(I have a few LeRoy Mercer CD's left for sale at $39.99 + S&H)

http://www.drwebman.com/leroymercer

Here are some places "The Real Leroy Mercer" CD has been shipped this month:

Anniston
Atlanta
Brentwood
Burlington
Canton
Dandridge
Dawson
Guntersville
Iraq
Knoxville
Montgomery
Monticello
Nashville
Richmond
Wylie


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Here's an 09-03-2004 email from Bettye Bean (John's sister-in-law):

From: "Bettye" xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: johnny bean stories
Date: Fri, 3 Sep 2004 17:00:23 -0400

I married Johnny's brother David in 1977 so I did know Johnny for a while. When we first got married,
Johnny looked as healthy as could be. Even after Johnny got sick, he was still busy raising hell and I never realized how sick he was. I certainly never thought he would die.

I was very shy around David's family for a while so I always read the newspaper, Time or the National Enquirer while I was at my in-laws house. At some point, Johnny decided that he was going to gather up all of the things I normally read and keep them near him. He wouldn't leave any reading material around and at times, he would actually sit on the National Enquirers. I would politely ask Johnny for a magazine or the newspaper and he would tell me that he had all of the papers in order and didn't want to get them out of order because there were articles he wanted to read in them. I would say, "Well, you can't read them all at once. I promise I'll give it back to you." But Johnny would not give me any of them. He was doing it just to bother me but he never laughed or let on that he was teasing. I would ask my husband why Johnny wouldn't give me anything to read and David would say that Johnny was just that way so I never knew he was teasing me until my mother-in-law told me that she was always telling Johnny to leave me alone.


Another story is about my husband David's best friend, James. Johnny always called James "Jame"
because James was only one person. So anytime James came in, Johnny would holler out "Hey Jame!" and James would get mad every time.

I am going to sign off now. I will email you some more Johnny stories later.

Thanks for listening.

Bettye Bean (not Johnny and David's sister, who is Betty Bean, but John's sister-in-law)


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Transcript of the famous EDDIE'S AUTO call:

Eddie's Auto
Hey, is this Eddie's Auto?
Yeah, this is Ed.
Well, who's this here?
This is Ed.
Well
Eddie's Auto, this is Eddie Auto your talking to.
Well, this is Bill Morgan up here just this side of Maynardsville. Uh, listen. I bought an oil filter off of ya here-whall-back and, uh, believe my damn car's blowed up now, and ah, well they told me to take it down there and that you'd pay for it.
Pay fur what?
Pay fur the damn motor.
Bullshit, who told you that?
Huh? They told me up in Maynardsville, by God.
They did?
They said, by God, if he don't, whip his damn ass.
Well you tell him, I'm right here any damn time he wants to come.
Well I'll tell you what, he was a big son of a bitch that said it.
Well, I don't give a damn, the bigger they are the harder they fall.
You ain't so smart your damn self.
Okay, you forget it.
Well, are you going to pay fur it?
I ain't paying fer a damn thing, I don't even know what your talking about.
It's a damn oilllllll filter. I bought it off of ya fair 'n square. You said it wuz a good un.
I don't know what you bought, I didn't tear your motor up.
Well, my boy did.
Well who ever tore it up tore it up I didn't tear it up.
Well, it seems to me a damn oil filter ought to hold up better than that.
Well, I didn't make the oil filter, and I didn't tear your motor up.
Well, shit-far you sold me the damn thing.
That don't make a damn if I did I didn't tear your motor up.
Well goddamn, shit, don't you stand behind what you sell?
I don't, I didn't tear your motor up to start with.
Well, it seems to me that a son of a bitch that don't stand behind what he sells.....
Well, I'm not no son of a bitch and you might be calling me a son of a bitch over the phone but I don't think you'd do it, by God, standing in front of me.
Huh, I'll whip your ass.
Well, let's see you do it, there's been bigger son of a bitches than you tried it.
Huh, I'll be down there before the damn day's over.
Well, I'll be right here.
You keep on, I'll be there.
Well, you just come right on.
You evidently don't know who I am....


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Thom McCann, call:

Salesman: Thom McCann, West Town.
LeRoy: Ah, yeah let me talk to the, uh, manager over 'ere.
Salesman: You got him.
LeRoy: This the manager?
Salesman: Yes sir.
LeRoy: Well listen I bought some damn boots over 'ere and the son of bitches got a little bit daimp and they folded up looks like a damn dogs’ be eatin' on em.
Salesman: What kind of boots are they?
LeRoy: They's supposed to be damn gooduns.
Salesman: (chuckles) Where did you buy em?
LeRoy: I bought um over there at your damn store, Tom McKee-un.
Salesman: When did you buy them?
LeRoy: Here while back, at's when!
Salesman: Well, you’ve got to be more specific than that.
LeRoy: HUH! well, well I’s just, all I’s wantin' to do was to get this thing settled and have you'nz to give me some new ones.
Salesman: You did?
LeRoy: Yeah.
Salesman: How did they get wet?
LeRoy: Well G*d damn, water, 'course
Salesman: (chuckles again)
LeRoy: HUH HUH HELL!........I’m haft to have some new boots out of it though, I’ll tell you at right now
Salesman: Uh huh
..or somebody'll get their damned ass whupped over it.
Salesman: I see. I see. Well, I’ll tell you, it's a, it's a, what we normally do is the customer when they have a complaint they bring the shoe to the store and we look at the shoe, then we give them another pair of shoes. We are not used to people calling up and threatening us, we are used to the customer coming in here and bringing the shoes in here and we look at them, then we make the adjustment.
LeRoy: Well, I don’t give a damn. You're going to hafta change, or somebody’s ass is going to get whupped, ...................HELLO?
Salesman: Yeah I’m here.
LeRoy: Well,..............(I'm tard a talking to a chicken shit bastards) if a son of a bitch sells a pair of shoes he ought to back um up, is the way I look at it.
Salesman: We back them up, sir, all the way buddy, bring em in here.
LeRoy: You going to give me some damn new ones?
Salesman: Well it they, if the, if the shoes are torn up, sure we will.
LeRoy: Well I’ll tell ye, well they're tore up! There ain't no doubt about that! I’ve bought shoes long enough to know when a shoe's tore up. and uh...
Salesman: Well we’ll be happy to make 'em good.
LeRoy: Well, I live all the way over on the other side of damn Knoxville, ....Maynardsville. I can’t be running in there for this, that or 'tother. Seems to me like it wouldn’t be too much damn trouble for you'nz to mail me a set.
Salesman: No sir we can’t do that.
LeRoy: Can’t do what?
Salesman: We can’t mail you a pair unless, sir, we have the other pair of boots. You mail us your old boots we will mail you a pair.
LeRoy: Well how longs that gonna be I’m gonna be runnin' around here barefooted?
Salesman: Sir, the only thing we can do is you bring the shoe to me and we’ll give you another pair.
LeRoy: If I haft to come down there I’m bringing both my boys with me, and if my boys come, then somebody’s ass'll be whupped.
Salesman: Well what do you expect us to do?
LeRoy: I expect you to stand there and get your ass whupped !
Salesman: We can’t mail you a pair of shoes.
LeRoy: Why not? You'nz got postal service over there, ain’t ye? We got it up here, that's what its for.
Salesman: Well how am I going to get the old shoes back
back? What's your name and address sir?
LeRoy: LeRoy Mercer. ............Ya got that?
Salesman: Yeah I’ve got it, go ahead.
LeRoy: Route 4...... Thompson School Road, ......... Corryton Tennessee.
Salesman: Where in Tennessee?
LeRoy: Corryton, I suppose you ain’t never heard of that neither.
Salesman: What’s the zip code?
LeRoy: Three seventy-nine, twenty-one.
Salesman: Uh huh. What’s your phone number sir?
LeRoy: Six, eight, seven, forty two, ninety one.
Salesman: Okay, now could you mail us those boots?
LeRoy: Well, I’ll mail um when I get my damn new ones. I ain’t going to just set them off in the mail, there I’ll be setting here with nothin'. You know what I mean.
Salesman: Yeah, and that's the only pair of shoes you’ve got?
LeRoy: Well it was my best pair. I’ve got some old boots. I don’t like to wear um all that much. ........
Salesman: Uh huh.
LeRoy: Don’t give me no damn run around or I’ll be down there.
Salesman: I’m not trying to give you a run around, I’m being as patient as I can be for somebody that's talking to me the way you are sir.
LeRoy: Well G*d damn? What do you expect?
Salesman: I’m not sure what to expect.
LeRoy: Good thing. Well..
Salesman: It’s highly, highly unusual just to mail, of course you haven’t told me what kind of boots they are or what size or anything.
LeRoy: Well what's your name?
Salesman: My names not important, sir
LeRoy: HUH, I’d say at's right........you asked for mine, seems like if a sumbitch asks for....
Salesman: Well if I’m going to mail you a pair of boots I need to know your name don’t I?
LeRoy: Yeah.
Salesman: Okay, but you haven’t told me what kind of boot it was or the size.
LeRoy: Well listen, if your going to get smart about it I’ll come down-nair now and whup ye ass, .
Salesman: (sighs)
LeRoy: It ain’t nothin' to me to whup a man’s ass, .......you might a heard of me.
Salesman: No sir I haven’t heard of you.
LeRoy: Well you goin' too, by G*d, if I have to whup ye ass I know your going to.
Salesman: Sir I don’t believe that's necessary at all.
LeRoy: Well it sounds to me like I’m going to haf-to.
Salesman: I’ll be happy to give you a pair of shoes if you’ll tell me what kind to mail you, I’ll mail them TODAY!
LeRoy: There 'em boots that's got them eagles on the side of um.
Salesman: Sir I don’t carry any boots that have eagles on the side of um......this is Thom McCann's.
LeRoy: I know at ! They’ve got some kind a little design, it ain’t necessarily an eagle, its wings.
Salesman: No sir I’m afraid not.........I don’t carry that kind of shoe.
LeRoy: Well G*d damn, you're saying you don’t have em?
Salesman: Yes sir that's correct.
LeRoy: You down there in West town?
Salesman: That's correct
LeRoy: Down there in the mall?
Salesman: That's right, Thom McCann's shoe store.
LeRoy: Down there, ....what's you next to?, Which stores is around?
Salesman: Hanover shoe store.
LeRoy: Are they uh, are they a radio store there?
Salesman: Yes sir, that's right, Hanover has that boot that your talking about.
LeRoy: They do?
Salesman: Yes sir they sure do.
LeRoy: Well I’ll whip his damn ass just the same as I'll whup.......
Salesman: I believe that's where you got it, they’ve got a boot just like that in the window.
LeRoy: Well I’ll tell you what, you take that name and all over ere and give it to um, and have them to mail me some in a ten and a half ‘D’ wide.
Salesman: Ten and a half ‘D’?
LeRoy: Yeah.
Salesman: All right I’ll sure do it.
LeRoy: And have um to call me by G*d if they ain’t gonna do it.
Salesman: I’ll be happy to do it.
LeRoy: And I’ll whup somebody's’ damned ass if they don’t.
Salesman: Well, I’ll sure get it over there to um.
LeRoy: And listen if I find out you got um, I’ll be down there to whup your damn ass.
Salesman: Well I don’t have em.
LeRoy: Well it's a good thing, its good thing for you if you don’t.
Salesman: Yeah.
LeRoy: Well.
Salesman: I’ve got some customers if you don’t mind. Okay?
LeRoy: Huh.
Salesman: I’ll take it right over to them immediately.
LeRoy: Well okay, but, I’ll be out there to check, ya, I’m a, I’m a contractor out there I build a lot times out in West Knoxville I’ll check and see if you got um.
Salesman: Okay, fine, I know Hanover’s where you got the shoes.
LeRoy: Well I can whup their ass the same as I can whup yours.
Salesman: I’ll take it over there to them, I’ll sure do it.
LeRoy: Well, okay thank ye.
Salesman: Uh-huh.
 

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